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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27479764">Always Together</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLaziestMotherfucker/pseuds/TheLaziestMotherfucker'>TheLaziestMotherfucker</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Old Guard (Movie 2020)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Canon Queer Character of Color, Death, Grief/Mourning, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Minor Character Death, Returning to Malta (The Old Guard)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-04-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 20:01:53</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,055</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27479764</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLaziestMotherfucker/pseuds/TheLaziestMotherfucker</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>They had only really spoken to each other about death once. Only once, surprisingly.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>157</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Always Together</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I saw what supernatural did and I won't lie it made me laugh and made me say bitch I wanna write death but without anyone dying so here ya go</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1">They had only really spoken to each other about death once. Only once, surprisingly. It was shortly after they had met Quynh and Andy. It was decades after Joe and Nicky had discovered their immortality, but it hadn’t even been one decade of them being lovers. It came up pretty quickly after meeting the two women and discussing their gift. They could die. Not for a long time, but one day they would die. And one of them had died.</p><p class="p1">Nicky and Joe hardly spoke the next day, not to each other and not to Andy and Quynh. Their shoulders weighed heavy with what would inevitably come. For decades they had accepted that they could not die and only in a brief story that came crashing down. They didn’t want to think about it. When their relationship had begun they thought themselves lucky. They would never have to face a life without one another. People equate love and death for a reason: it makes people fearful and curious if love would be worth it in the end. </p><p class="p1">Joe and Nicky believed it would be worth it. They had been far too gone on each other to even think of leaving the other, much less change the course of their lives. </p><p class="p1">They both wished to themselves that they would be the first to go when the time came. They wished to never know the world without each other in it. They wished to never feel the pain of what it would be like to lose each other. But that was the thing about death, wasn’t it? Even in death, they would not know peace for they had left the other behind. They had left the other one behind with the rest of the world, and as one of them faced their greatest loss and heartbreak, the other would not be there to comfort him. In death, they would be separated and neither would be at peace until reunited in whatever life existed outside of their mortal world. </p><p class="p1">They’ve both known loss before. They’ve been the lost one just as well. They’ve known grief and heartache. They wondered if losing each other would hurt more than anything they had ever felt before. They wondered if it would hurt as such because they had loved so intensely or because they had loved for so long. Although they supposed, love didn’t matter in relation to time. It only mattered that they had loved. They loved each other so intensely that they had become each other’s moon and sun. The grief that they would inevitably feel - as grief always feels - would forever be immeasurable. No matter how long anyone had lived and loved. Love is love and with that comes heartbreak. </p><p class="p1">Upon hearing the story of Lykon, Joe and Nicky did not let go of each other. They were never the type to be openly affectionate outside of them holding each other in the night, but the day after hearing the story - actually the following <em>weeks</em> - they held each other's hands as tight as they could. They knew it would be a while until they had a night to themselves again to properly divulge in their emotions, so in the meantime, they held onto each other. Andy assured them they were far to new to die yet, but that didn’t matter. One day, one random day, their death would be their last. But the gods would have to get through one of them first before getting a chance to even <em>touch</em> the other. They would protect each other for as long as they could, even if their time was far far away. </p><p class="p1">Weeks after hearing the story of Lykon, they were able to find a room. They went to a small inn where they were fortunate to get their own room. The second they stepped through the door, the air changed and became heavy. They didn’t speak for a few hours. They knew the discussion was coming but they wanted to hold each other first. They bathed for a long while, holding each other close and reveling in the sound of their breathing and the occasional splash of the water. The roads and streets were busy outside, but it was drowned out by the peace of their room. </p><p class="p1">After that, they changed into their linens and climbed into bed to read for a brief moment under the candlelight. When the candle was blown out, the moonlight illuminated the room, giving enough light for them to see each other's faces. Not that they really needed to. </p><p class="p1">Nicky was the first to speak, which Joe was grateful for. His words were simple enough but the meaning behind them was not. "We can die," he spoke, holding onto Joe's hand as he turned on his side to face him. </p><p class="p1">Joe touched Nicky's cheek, stroking it at first to feel his skin - feel that he was with him - then cupping his jaw to bring their foreheads together. He was unable to comprehend how he would have this man for centuries upon centuries only for one simple day to rip them apart. He knew his breathing was changing. He could hear it. Before he had a chance to speak or sob, Nicky blurted out in a cry, "Yusuf, you cannot leave me.”</p><p class="p1">Nicky believed in fate. He knew that whenever their mortality returned it would be their time. There would be no use in fighting it. He believed in that. Logically, he knew that age did not play a role in when a person would die. The young randomly die while their elders continue to thrive. But the thinking will always be that the older will die first. Joe was only three years older than Nicky, but those three years felt like milestones in the idea of death. His mind reminded Nicky that maybe he would die before Joe, but his heart believed in the myth that the older would die first and that twisted his heart so painfully that it bled over the image of Joe not waking up. </p><p class="p1">Nicky couldn’t lose Joe. Joe couldn’t lose Nicky. Why couldn’t death take them together?</p><p class="p1">Joe kissed his hand, holding it tightly and moving closer to Nicky. He was as upset by those words as he was surprised. Joe wanted to promise him an eternal life of love they could live and he could not. In return, he expressed his pain, “And you cannot leave me, Nicolò.”</p><p class="p1">Nicky reacted the same. He squeezed Joe’s hand and kissed it. </p><p class="p1">They didn’t talk much after that, surprisingly. There wasn’t more to say. To them, nothing expressed it more perfectly than asking - no <em>demanding</em> - that they not part for death without the other. They discovered their immortality together and they would discover death together as well. It wasn’t a promise. Making such a promise would hurt them even more when the time came. The idea of breaking the most important promise they had made to each other on their death bed would shadow over their last goodbyes, had they been granted to give such words.</p><p class="p1">Instead, they held each other tight and kissed one another. They kissed their lips, their cheeks, their foreheads, their eyes, their entire faces. All while their arms were wrapped tightly around their bodies, keeping them close together. They shed their tears while the other wiped them away. They listened to their breaths, knowing when they needed to give a reassuring squeeze or a gentle stroke. Any comfort they could give they would give. And it was enough. They were always enough. All they always needed was each other. </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">
  <strong>xXx</strong>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1">The night had not been forgotten. Lykon was never forgotten. Death always loomed over them but they grew used to the idea of it happening one day. It was daunting but inevitable and there was no use in wasting their life over their fear of death. Their time would be better spent loving one another and their ever-growing family and trying to help the world become better. They wanted to do right. They lived their lives as normally as immortals good. When they weren’t on jobs, they were doing mundane activities: gardening, traveling, teaching, learning, etc. Anything and everything they could do, really. The world was always changing and with that was knowledge that they could always benefit from learning. And they wanted to learn, as well. </p><p class="p1">It all came to a halt after Andy became mortal. A thousand years. They had been immortal for a thousand years and they had never witnessed one of them becoming mortal. Death was always looming but it never felt as real or touchable as it did when they found out about Andy. She was older than them. Much, much older than them. They couldn’t help but fear their time would come soon. Andy assured them it wouldn’t, given the time between her and Lykon’s mortality, but it shook them awake again from the somewhat comfortable life they were living. </p><p class="p1">Their time at Merrick’s was short. It was Andy’s only job after returning from a year-long break. It was only <em>one</em> job that spurred on another vacation for all of them. Nile with Andy and, as always, Nicky and Joe. The two men didn’t want to split up. Who knew how much time they had left with Andy. But she insisted. Like that one night, so long ago, she knew they needed to be alone. They needed to be briefly isolated from the rest of the world to figure out their own world. And after all, Nicky had said he wanted to return to Malta…</p><p class="p1">So they went back. Only for two weeks. They didn’t need much more time than that. They recruited Copley and he would find them jobs and they would carry them out. There was never a shortage of cruelty in the world and they wanted to do what they could, especially Andy. Her time was now limited and she wanted to do what she could while she could do it. And there was no way in hell they were going to let her go without backup. Nile was great and could take every bullet she could, but the more of them the better. They always worked better as a team. </p><p class="p1">Until their two weeks were up, Andy and Nile went to Paris. Joe and Nicky went back to Malta.</p><p class="p1">And Malta had always been a curious place for the couple. It was their safe haven that they could not afford to often go to. More often than not, it was their place of peace. Nothing ever touched them there. Nothing ever disturbed them there. All identities and pretenses vanished in their small, old home that was filled with their lives. Occasionally, Malta was a place of immense pleasure as well. Sex was never limited to one location but there was something about being hidden away in their home that made them incapable of keeping their hands off each other. The world outside their home was one they were trying to do right by, but the world inside their home was theirs. They relaxed into it no matter how brief their time there might be. </p><p class="p1">This time was different. It was a place of comfort but it served for their desperation to ensure each other that they were alive. Much like the one night centuries and centuries ago, they were waiting for their one night to speak. Neither of the men were ready to envision a life without Andy, much less each other. They had sex in those first few days of Malta. A lot of sex. With anything else, they would’ve talked, but they couldn’t yet. Their little world felt far too loud to speak yet. They worried their words would be drowned out by the chaos and pain. They weren’t ready to recognize that their time could be sooner than they thought. </p><p class="p1">Nothing stayed of course. There was never any soreness, never any bruises or markings. It always vanished in a matter of moments like it usually did. The sex - and yes sex, not lovemaking, although it was always loving - was desperate and rough. It was pleasurable as always, but that wasn’t why they were having it. They needed to feel the other, needed to kiss the other, needed to the other. Their lovemaking was always thorough and beautiful and emotional. It was nothing like the sex they were having. They didn’t often have sex that was so rooted in the need for life. Sure, sometimes they fucked after a particularly harrowing death, but it didn’t go on for days as this did. They wanted to feel everything they could and give the other the same feelings. </p><p class="p1">They were waiting for that one night. They would both feel when they were ready. They knew they would. </p><p class="p1">About six days into their trip, they woke up and felt it. They didn’t talk about it right away, though. No, instead they both wanted to pray. That morning they got dressed, ate breakfast, and kissed goodbye as they went their separate ways. Yusuf to a Mosque and Nicolò to a church. They needed to be apart that morning. Usually, they would accompany one another, but neither of them could today. Perhaps because they both knew that they would pray for their life to be taken first. The gods had gifted them rebirth in immortality together. Neither was sure the gods would let them die together. </p><p class="p1">They prayed, and they both cried as they did. They prayed for Andy and that she was safe and would live out the rest of her days. They prayed for Booker and that he would find a way out of his grief and find himself again. They prayed for Quynh. They prayed she would be freed either physically or spiritually. They prayed for Nile as the first century will always be the hardest. The world will change far faster than she had expected. If that wasn’t hard enough, she would face the loss of her family. Nile would hopefully grow to love them - grow to love <em>Andy</em> - only to lose them eventually, too. </p><p class="p1">They prayed for the rest of the world and that somehow the wrongs they were righting would stop. </p><p class="p1">They prayed, and they both cried as they did, feeling the heartbreak of losing their loved ones despite still having them. They let themselves feel their fears and grief that they hadn’t felt - or hadn’t let themselves feel - in quite some time. Neither of them knew how much time had passed once they were done. Rather numbly, they walked back to their home. The world had gone quiet again, ready for the husbands to speak to each other. Nicky had arrived first, letting his tears fall down once again in the privacy of their home. Shortly after, Joe came back too, eyes as puffy as Nicky’s were. </p><p class="p1">It only took a few large steps before they wrapped each other in their arms, burying their faces in their shoulders. They didn’t cry then. They felt too relieved. Their grips were tight but the embrace was warm and comforting, and as always, loving. They stood for a long while, holding each other close and reveling in the sound of their breathing. All they could hear and feel and see were each other, which was everything they wanted at that moment. </p><p class="p1">They kissed each other. Eyes close and grip lax, stopping to rest their foreheads against the other. Their evening was quiet after that. They cooked dinner and ate, cleaning up the dishes afterward to then retreat to their couch to read. They lit their candles and read as the world around them roared and moved on. Not for the first time, Nicky could not focus. Joe’s eyes looked strained as if he was forcing himself to focus on the words in front of him. He was probably waiting for Nicky to go to the bedroom. Often, their most personal discussions happen there. It was a habit after a thousand years of having to find privacy in a usual home of four. </p><p class="p1">Nicky took Joe’s hand and cupped it with his own, kissing his knuckles and tucking it under his chin. Joe was looking at him with those wide eyes that Nicky always loved to see. They were always tearful with so much love and adoration that Nicky never knew what to do with himself. No one ever made him feel so loved than Joe did with one expression. Nicky could only ever hope that he made Joe feel as loved as he made him feel every day. </p><p class="p1">“I don’t know what I would do without you, Yusuf,” He spoke with a voice so quiet it was almost a whisper. His eyes started to tear up and, like that night so long ago, Joe moved closer to him, touching his cheek, and leaning in to kiss his forehead. Just by touch alone, Nicky sighed in relief. </p><p class="p1">“Nicolò, I do not know what I would do without you,” Joe said in return. His voice was so soft. Not many people got to hear Joe speak like that. Gone was the confidence and charisma of the man he usually is, and revealed was the soft-spoken, gentle man that he always is. Joe could be soft with anyone, and he often was, but there were moments of intimacy where his voice sounded so sweet, his eyes so gentle, and his touch so warm that it always left Nicky speechless. For Joe, it was Nicky’s smile that blinded him. The one that so rarely came out unless Joe, and usually only Joe, could make him laugh.</p><p class="p1">Andy and Booker could always get small, warm smile, but Joe was the one who could always made him laugh and show that beautiful smile that he loved so much.</p><p class="p1">And like that very night, they talked no more about death. They held each other, they kissed one another, and they wiped their tears away, never letting their hands stray apart. There was nothing else to say. All they could do was protect and fight, and pray that one day the gods will have mercy and take them together. God help anyone who would try to separate them, even God.</p><p class="p1">They were always meant to be together. They would always be together. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I hope you liked it! Please leave a comment! Even if it’s just a heart emoji!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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